Sorry everyone whom I talk with on DA whom I owe artwork for but I just can't do this!

There are too many important things in life and that is my love for the man who won't see me anymore.. and you can call me a crazy bitch and selfish, ugly, lonely, pathetic, worthless bitch that I am! Well its all true.. the only thing I want is the man that I love come back...to know he's alright.. to hear his laugh and see his smiling face... so I can just wrap him in my arms and tell him how much I love him.. but he's gone.. he's just not gone from my heart, mind, soul, and life..  I love him too much to see anything bad happen to him... I wish I was dead.. at least be his Guardian Angel watching and protecting him and his family.. I want to explain to him why I was always gone.. Well I'll tell you all.. I was sick for the past 2 months now.. weezing and gasping for air.. I went to the doctor's.. they says theres something growing inside me that they don't know about and they took it to a lab to study.. I have a history of cancer, heart attacks, and strokes in my family.. now my legs are getting weak.. will I end up in a wheelchair like my grandfather? He was perfectly healthy.. will I end up on dialysis.. who knows.. will I die of lack of air... I'm coughing up blood and it hurts to speak.. its like someone slashed my throat all the way to where I'll bleed out to death... well there is no real way to know when my time is up.. God will take me when he wants to.. I wish it was now.. I'm sorry to all my friends I made here on DA.. if you have the heart then read this..

Have a Merry Christmas...

Love, HarmonyWaters..  really known as Jazzlyn Torren Smith..